Archive for feelings

Voice Of A Friend

Posted in Creativity, Life, Lyrics, Music, Songs, soundtrack with tags , , , , on June 7, 2016 by vixstar1314

“Voice Of A Friend” ~ Blue October

Light the fire in this castle
Watch it burn into a glow
By the river fear of quite sincere
There’s a draw bridge life support.
There’s a plank we’ll have to crawl upon
But dare not look below
Where the water scene is crystal clean
Where the clouds are raining snow

Hush hush baby
there’s a lot of other ways to choke
We’re in the freak show now
and we’re dealing with a mind of its own
when too many worlds collide
I’d like to think it would be good if we talked
I ask you to not leave my side
I can’t, man,
This is quicksand alone

So I ask you thru the voice of a friend
Why don’t you stay with me

We’re a submarine submerging
Simply smiling at the earth
We’re sending roses to the loved ones
Who had a hand in our rebirth
But still another day I’ll cling to you
For faint directions home
Where we all will sit with open arms
To block the rocks we’ve thrown

Hush hush baby
There’s a lot of other ways to choke
We’re in the freak show now
And we’re dealing with a mind of its own
When too many worlds collide
I’d like to think it would be good if we talk
I ask you to not leave my side
I can’t, man,
This is quicksand alone

So I ask you thru the voice of a friend
“Why don’t you stay with me?”
I ask you thru the voice of a friend
“Why don’t you stay with me?
Stay with me.”

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The untold and unfinish but understandable story

Posted in Creativity, introspective, Life, Thoughts with tags , , , , , , on April 19, 2016 by vixstar1314

It was always going to be unfinished.

From the moment when I finally realised what had happened, how overtime my feelings, your feelings, our feelings had developed and interconnected, I foresaw the not so complete ending.My gut feeling, my inkling was strong and accurate however this didn’t soften the blow in the end. I knew it was coming but it was never easy or possible to dissolve the feelings that were engraved into me.

After all that had happened, after the years that had past. The unbearable pains that torn through every corner of my insides, the sleepless nights, the buckets of tears and the restless days. Here I am today. 

So much untold and unfinish and today won’t be the day they are unwrapped but I have an understanding of what I have been through, how you were and still are good in my eyes. I have yet to fully escape but I think I never will. After everything I still can’t leave all the feelings behind. You are still part of my thoughts, less than before, but still presence some days and nights. Most of the time it brings me comfort now rather than pain. I guess time does heal aspects no matter what.

I could never really define how and why it all started but I knew why and how it had to be an unfinished ending.

This is the story I will never be able to completely write…

 

 

The non existence

Posted in Creativity, introspective, Life, This May Help U!, Thoughts with tags , , , , on March 10, 2016 by vixstar1314

The non existence of “fair”

There is nothing in this world which can be said is fair. Aside from the word itself that exists.

There will never be perfection.

Even though this is known, at times I struggle to make peace with this. Of how sometimes grey exists. Of how this world is, how there are so many wrongs. So many unfairness and unbalance. Thus I try to convince myself just to let it be….

Being able to step into 2016

Posted in introspective, Life, Personal, Reads, Society, This May Help U!, Thoughts with tags , , , , , , , , on December 31, 2015 by vixstar1314

….is a gift.

Life and today isn’t a given. To have what you have today is already a gift. Treasure it, as you don’t know if tomorrow would come. Furthermore if you wish to go back to yesterday it is impossible.

As people say: live everyday like it is your last day and one day you will be right. Upon being on the last day of 2015 and approaching 2016, I see past and future. Old and new. Death and Life. We are guaranteed a mixture of these in our life time but often we cannot control them. Especially in today’s society I feel that there is higher risks all around us than ever before. Is it bad to feel unsafe in your own society, the world seems to have become a more scarier place. Therefore I would like to be able to control what I write and when it appears. I know tomorrow may come but I what to leave this behind in case it doesn’t. So when that day comes round I will be physically right one last time and I would like to convey the following:

The strangeness of it all is that upon reading this message it will truly be from the past into your future. Odd and sad but hopefully with a touch of much-needed answers and providing meaningful understanding about me over the years from reading my posts. There are so many times when I had not been able to put both my thoughts and feelings into speech and I guess that would be most difficult for those closest to me, my family. I have often not been able to say the simplest but truest aspect of I love you, I understand. But the truth is I really do.

Deep down within me I always felt like I could do good for this world, day-to-day I try to be a better person and citizen to fellow people. I believe there is good in us all. So lets all say bye to the bad and sad in 2015 and start a fresh in 2016, if we have that gift to step into 2016 treasure it and make it worth wild.

The feeling of missing

Posted in introspective, Life, lost, Personal, Thoughts with tags , , , , , on November 16, 2015 by vixstar1314

Thoughts, memories and pictures of you, of us from back then still tugs inside of me.

You will probably never know but I still miss you dearly every now and then.

Well perhaps not exactly you, but the things we used to be, the connection, what we were, what we use to be.

It hurts yet I know it was beautiful.

All Of The Stars

Posted in Lyrics, Music, Songs, soundtrack with tags , , , , , , , , , , on August 27, 2015 by vixstar1314

“All Of The Stars” – Ed Sheeran

“It’s just another night
And I’m staring at the moon
I saw a shooting star
And thought of you
I sang a lullaby
By the waterside and knew
If you were here,
I’d sing to you
You’re on the other side
As the skyline splits in two
I’m miles away from seeing you
But I can see the stars
From America
I wonder, do you see them, too?

So open your eyes and see
The way our horizons meet
And all of the lights will lead
Into the night with me
And I know these scars will bleed
But both of our hearts believe
All of these stars will guide us home

I can hear your heart
On the radio beat
They’re playing ‘Chasing Cars’
And I thought of us
Back to the time,
You were lying next to me
I looked across and fell in love
So I took your hand
Back through lamp-lit streets and knew
Everything led back to you
So can you see the stars?
Over Amsterdam
You’re the song my heart is
Beating to

So open your eyes and see
The way our horizons meet
And all of the lights will lead
Into the night with me
And I know these scars will bleed
But both of our hearts believe
All of these stars will guide us home

And, oh, I know
And oh, I know, oh
I can see the stars
From America”

Some days

Posted in introspective, Life, lost, Personal, Thoughts with tags , on February 23, 2015 by vixstar1314

Some days I feel nothing.

Surrounded by pure emptiness.

Other days,

I feel too much,

that it overwhelms me.

FeelingsHere

 

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