Archive for changes

Moving on

Posted in Creativity, Life, Thoughts with tags , , , on July 11, 2017 by vixstar1314

Far too often, moving on is a tough decision and even harder to action when it comes down to it.

I for one, know that change is always present, yet dislike it. Because changes is unsettling and means leaving something or someone behind and I find it difficult to detach from the comfortable habit especially if I have been in it for years. Yet when it comes down to it, I force myself to do it when it is absolutely necessary.

Over the past 2-3 years I have learnt to say more feelings when it is really time to share them, more importantly when having to say more solid and real goodbyes such as when leaving jobs, goodbyes when visiting people when you are on holiday or not being sure when you will realistically get to see someone face to face again. I guess a part of this stems from knowing I never really know when my last moment on this Earth would be so I would say to you – say the stuff you want to otherwise you may miss the chance forever or worse separated by life and death.

Saying goodbye to people is the toughest of “moving on” because you know that even though you will probably see these people again and they will also live on in your memories or you will stay in contact with them via social media yet it will not be the same as being so close by. However the ironic thing is that no day is the same regardless of what happens, so we have to face the change and deal with it no matter how much discomfort it brings or how much we really don’t want to deep down. Because this is how we grow and develop. We have to change just as the world rotates around each day, changing…

Understanding and explanation

Posted in Creativity, introspective, Life, Personal, Thoughts, Time with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 3, 2012 by vixstar1314

Vixstar1314: *short collection of thoughts*

Ever since that change,

something significant had shifted extensively within me.

What exactly has happened?

This question puzzles me.

With certainty,

I can answer I will never be the same again – something has permanently been taken from within me.

And my understanding of everything else has now become something that has continuously troubled me.

Many days,

many nights,

I have asked myself again and again,

hoping, praying, to get the answer.

It never came.

Just as the feelings never evaporated into the surroundings,

unlike my words. IMG_7124

Dreams, Words, People.

Posted in Creativity, Event, Fiction, introspective, Life, Personal, Reads, Thoughts, Time with tags , , , , , , , , , , on November 25, 2012 by vixstar1314

Only a few get me, but they are actually only scratching the surface, how comes? Because I am too shattered within. When I try to speak I find that I am not sure at all how to put it into words, it does not come out the way my mind/heart actually wants it to. It has now been like this for so long that I think it has gotten worse. It is like there are two of me and I can barely control and combine them together. It is split. I feel that it is so similar but yet so different at the same time

I write to process the thinking, to understand and I have come to realize this is part of my characteristic it’s the way I have been created. To write is somewhat easier than to speak.

I can’t really explain… Staring into space hoping to find the right words or answers…but never really do.
When I lost you was when I lost the ability to live without darkness, to breathe with ease, there is now forever a part in my heart that howls into the dark empty hollowness within that which tries to continue pumping blood through an almost empty outer human shell. The events with you provided the catalyst that would ultimately cause spirals, but the closing thought for this post is as follows:

Some Day

Posted in Creativity, Event, God, introspective, Life, Personal, This May Help U!, Thoughts, Time with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 15, 2012 by vixstar1314

Far too often everywhere I am at I see people together, there are times when it makes me feel so alone. When I am with so many people yet still feel like there is just me.


Some Day…………..

In the distant future……

your views may change……..





Today I saw that which I once thought so strongly about…. It had all become very different.

To those who may be struggling with difficulties in life:

someday your worries today will seem very little. Have faith. Life holds great plans for you, even if you don’t see it now, remember it is the unexpected that provides the greatest influences.


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