Pray

Praying is a very special action. However you will find people all do it differently. Some find they have to pray together, some loudly, some quietly, some alone, some when they need it most, it ranges so much.

I personally like to pray when I am alone, when it is quiet so that I can talk to God. I like it to be privately. The strange thing is that so often I know I pray for people who don’t even give me a second thought at night. Yet I still pray for them. Sometimes I ask myself why do I still bother then? I guess in my heart praying for them to be safe and healthy and it coming true brings me comfort, to know that they are ok is more than enough.  

Memories

Memories and songs can easily dig up thoughts that go back so long I fogotten they existed.

Time continues to go on.

Memories buried but can be digged up.

Alex & Sierra – Little Do You Know

Little Do You Know”

[Sierra:]
Little do you know
How I’m breaking while you fall asleep
Little do you know
I’m still haunted by the memories
Little do you know
I’m trying to pick myself up piece by piece

Little do you know
I need a little more time

Underneath it all I’m held captive by the hole inside
I’ve been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind
I’m ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight

Little do you know
I need a little more time

[Alex:]
I’ll wait, I’ll wait
I love you like you’ve never felt the pain,
I’ll wait
I promise you don’t have to be afraid,
I’ll wait
The love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me

Little do you know
I know you’re hurting while I’m sound asleep
Little do you know
All my mistakes are slowly drowning me
Little do you know
I’m trying to make it better piece by piece

Little do you know
I, I love you ’til the sun dies

[Alex & Sierra:]
Oh wait, just wait
I love you like I’ve never felt the pain,
Just wait
I love you like I’ve never been afraid,
Just wait
Our love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me

I’ll wait (I’ll wait), I’ll wait (I’ll wait)
I love you like you’ve never felt the pain,
I’ll wait (I’ll wait)
I promise you don’t have to be afraid,
I’ll wait
The love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me
Lay your head on me
So lay your head on me

[Alex:]
‘Cause little do you know
I, I love you ’til the sun dies

The non existence

The non existence of “fair”

There is nothing in this world which can be said is fair. Aside from the word itself that exists.

There will never be perfection.

Even though this is known, at times I struggle to make peace with this. Of how sometimes grey exists. Of how this world is, how there are so many wrongs. So many unfairness and unbalance. Thus I try to convince myself just to let it be….

Beautifully Broken

HeartSphere

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” ~ Ernest Hemingway

I’ve traveled through many spheres. Some have been simple fleeting moments spent in one place, one situation, or in one frame of thought. Nevertheless, they are all part of my dynamic, my gestalt. Combined, they are the collaborated experiences that makes me who I am, that forms how I think, act and react to life.

Our experiences are our life. They form the person we become and the life that we live. So, we travel through the sphere of life lessons, of formless forms, intangible thoughts and deep feelings. It is a sphere that we rarely want to see, yet, this is the sphere we all dwell in. This is accepting life. This is accepting ourselves, flaws and all.

Exactly a year ago today, I arrived here, where I currently live. I arrived here…

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Just An Option

GROUND000

Why are we still here?
Why do we still talk?
What is there to gain?
By doing the same old walk?
–
Why do you still message?
Why do you still call
It’s like you skip on the edge
But won’t dive at all
–
Are you in? Are you out?
I’m not quite sure.
Hugs and kisses, xox
And friends again, just like before
–
Should I dive in?
Should I stay out?
Experience says
Do nothing if in doubt.
–
Why fall if you won’t catch?
What is love if it doesn’t come back?
Tis just precious jewels
Hidden in a robber’s sack.
–
Am i just the second option
In case others don’t work out?
Am I just part of your addiction
Attention you can’t live without
–
Do I really mean anything to you?
Or am I just your fix?
Talk when you need
Get your…

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Where is home?

I often wonder to myself, where is home?

Which brings me to this home I heard sometime ago……

Lost & Far From Home – Katie Costello

With her head on her pillow and her pain tucked under the sheets

Music playing softly without a steady beat
The TV flickers flames of color; it ignites the room
A black and white face, the colors escape, her heartache

She ran away, so far away
That the streets were no longer paved with lines
The soles of her feet weren’t as tough as she claimed them to be

She wiped her eyes, it was no surprise
That she was lost and far from home, strange unfamiliar signs
Little to coincide, however she packed her bags and made her way
Anywhere her feet could take her

With her arm around her keepsakes and her mind on her mistakes
She climbed a hill – one of a kind, numb to her step, she had to accept
Changed scenery, it was now clear to see torn petals on a flower of her past
Memories she hoped wouldn’t last

She ran away, so far away
That the streets were no longer paved with lines
The sole of her feet weren’t as tough as she claimed them to be

She wiped her eyes, it was no surprise
That she was lost and far from home, strange unfamiliar signs
Little to coincide, however she packed her bags and made her way
Anywhere her feet could take her

With her head on her pillow and her pain tucked under the sheets
Music playing softly without a steady beat, without a steady beat

Fly

My thoughts and feelings written in letters,

fly around and become doves,

going back to where they belong,

back to its purest form of nature itself.

Just because

Just because I have to live on, to stay alive, even if I don’t feel like it.

I am mainly kept alive by oxygen, even though breathing comes naturally, it feels like an effort.

Time never seems enough.

I often wonder what life is really about. Looking ahead, into a so-call future I see nothing as such. So they say live in the now, just because…

One Way

One Way – Rose Cousins

I break where you bend.
I take what you send.
And we both pretend,
But I start where you end.

When I say, you know.
When I fall, you go.
I row this boat
Too fast, too slow.

I’ve got one way,
And you’ve got one way.

I break where you bend.
I take what you send.
We both pretend,
But I know that I start where you end.

Where you end.
Where you end.
Where you end.
Where you end.
Where you end.