Broken Us

Vixstar1314: *collection of thoughts*

Broken Us:

We all feel pain.

tears

Some more so than others.

Some more than words can ever express.

Me, expressing feelings for those who have lost, especially for family and friends of:

Jessica Laney , Joshua Unsworth, Hannah Smith, Izzy Dix…

Life is hard when you lose apart of yourself.

It is even harder when you lose so much of yourself.

This can be a result of various reasons and influences:

from other people,

from yourself,

from external factors,

from internal factors.

The bottom line is losing control of yourself is the worse.

I don’t want to change myself.

Why should I have to for this world?

Shouldn’t I be the person God had created me to be?

I’m a good, kind-hearted, thoughtful, caring person to others,

but it has gotten me nowhere.

My soul had disappeared the day you let go.

I am broken.

I am lost.

The hardest critic of me is myself.

My darkest enemy is myself.

I am sinking.

I cannot handle it anymore.

I am trying to use a mask to cover the wounds and bruises inside.

coverIt is getting harder and harder to act ok.

The darkness has absorbed so much of me.

I tell myself it will get better.

I will stop sinking,

but I watch as my words just echo into an empty hole.

Over many years I had built walls to protect myself.

However like a storm you had breached all my security,

rendering me powerless to you.

You then took everything,

leaving me on my own

my heart shattered.

My hopes destroyed.

All I know now is sadness,

and being stuck in this,

has consumed me beyond recognition.

I no longer have the ability to care.

I have gotten use to it,

so it feels fine but reality is it isn’t.

Sleep is a safe haven.

Where I can imagine a world far from here.

Where I can see you in my dreams.

I have no strength to stand,

nor shine.

I am lost

I often ask myself:

are my still alive?

thesethoughtsofmine

 

 

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