Deep

A part of my brain gets that it’s not your fault for hurting me, it’s mine for thinking you would not, and it’s mine for letting you. Yet it still hurts. 

Sometimes in my mind I think of the worst possible thing that could happen so when it finally does it will not feel so bad. However that is just me trying to trick myself. As deep deep deep down I know that there are somethings which are definitely going to happen, it’s just a matter of when, and how shattering the impact will be.

I am aware that everything and everyone can be replaced. It will not be an exact replacement as in this world no two things are exactly the same. However memories can be forgotten and wiped away by new ones overshadowing old ones. The world moves quickly forward. But for some it moves much quicker whereas for others a day goes by but it feels like it has been a year.

Need a break? Do you ever find:

There are times when you really want to just go somewhere very different
from where you are at the moment, go to a country, where you just arrive and
walk to where-ever, anywhere as long as it’s not here.
To run freely.

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